I just want to be a Lorelai

Sigh.  Last time I wrote, we had just found out that we are moving to Hawaii.  Beaches!  Sunshine!  Another amazing culture to experience!  While not everyone was as thrilled with our news (particularly family), we were very happy and excited to see what this next phase of our military life has to offer our family.  Yes, it is far.  Yes, it is expensive to travel and visit.  Yes, it is expensive to live there.  And yes, we have lived far away for quite some time.  However, I have always had the thought that if Hawaii is offered, you do not turn it down or say, “Nah, I’ll get you next time.”  It will not happen again.  You take it, live it, and either love it or hate it.

Maybe it is the strange winter-like weather we are experiencing in Bavaria right now.  Maybe my hectic life is keeping me from connecting with others.  Maybe I am just frustrated.  Whatever the circumstances, I am feeling very “blah” and disconnected from others right now.  During these moments, I either go into hibernation/stress mode, or I go into my Gilmore Girls mode.  This time, I am choosing the latter.  I focus on family, my life, and my own interests.  In Gilmore Girls mode, you can be a Lorelai or a Rory, and I always want to be a Lorelai.

If you have not seen Gilmore Girls or have no idea what I am talking about, I do not know if we can be friends anymore.  Joking, but only partially.  Gilmore Girls is one of my all-time favorite shows about a mother and a daughter living a hilarious, ironic, intriguing life in a small town in Connecticut.  If this town actually existed, I’m pretty sure I would want to live there.  We even named one of our children Lorelei (spelled differently from the character because this way made more sense to us).  I always wanted to have a mother-daughter relationship like that on the show with my own daughters.  I think I have some of the same traits and habits, but life is not a TV show.


If you are a Lorelai, you are outgoing and spunky.  You are unique in every way:  style, music, habits, conversations, etc.  You always find the funny retort or the best comeback for anything thrown at you.  While you may be in agony on the inside, you are charming and witty on the outside.  You dress in funny tees, eat as much junk food as you want without gaining a pound, and you charm everyone around you.  In short, Lorelai is pretty awesome.

GILMORE GIRLS (Season 3) Image #GG02-0175 Pictured: Alexis Bledel as Rory Gilmore Photo Credit: ©The WB / Andrew Eccles

If you are a Rory, you are more reserved.  Despite this, you are an overachiever who strives to do everything, all at the same time.  You love solitary tasks like reading, organizing, studying, and personal growth; on the other hand, you do not shy away from a challenge or  a chance to work with others for the greater good.  You may be shy, but you are also a witty conversationalist and amazing friend.

I would say that I am generally a good mix of both.  I love reading and solitary activities.  I think I appreciate them more now that I am never alone.  Never.  I am not shy, and I excel at challenging myself.  I can win a battle of wits with almost anyone, and I can also use my brain to win an argument without an insult.  I like to think that I infuse my children’s lives with structure but also spunk, irony, and a little chaos.  But if I had to strive for one, I would like to be a Lorelai.

Why a Lorelai?  She has her flaws:  she makes terrible, irrational choices, she can say the wrong thing at the wrong time, and she is so hyper.  It’s all the caffeine, to be honest.  But forcing myself to branch out and to be this bigger, louder person would be good for me.  It would force me out of my shell that I tend to crawl into, especially when I am feeling frustrated and down.  It would remind me to be spontaneous with the kids and to find fun in any situation.  Finally, it would let me embrace myself as is – flaws, insecurities, and all.  Rory is amazing – intelligent, caring, confident in herself – and I love those parts of me.  Lorelai is all the things I want to improve on.

At the end of the day, we just all want to be Lorelai Gilmore….right?


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